Category Archives: Disneyland

Paint the Night Parade (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

(Music begins with music box version of “Baroque Hoedown.”)

CHORUS
La la la la, etc.

(Fanfare.)

FEMALE CHORUS
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls,
Disney proudly presents
Our spectacular nighttime pageant of magic and imagination,
In millions of dazzling lights (lights)
And astounding musical sounds.
It’s the Paint the Night Parade!

(Music transitions to “When Can I See You Again?” by Owl City.)

MALE SOLOIST
Switch on the sky, and the stars glow for you.
Go see the world, ’cause it’s all so brand new.
Don’t close your eyes, ’cause your future’s ready to shine,
It’s just a matter of time before we learn how to fly!
Welcome to the rhythm of the night.
Something’s in the air, you can’t deny.

Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
Kick your heels up when you join the fun.
As the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
I gotta know…

CHORUS
When can we do this again?

(First dancers and floats pass by. TINKER BELL flies, while PETER PAN sits atop the title float that reads “Disney Paint the Night Electrical Parade.” Music changes to “Baroque Hoedown” sung by a cappella singers.)

MALE VOICES
You can fly! You can fly!

CHORUS
You can fly! You can fly! You can fly!

MALE SOLOIST
The second star to the right
Shines in the night for you.
To tell you that the dreams you plan…

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
Really can come true!

FEMALE SOLOIST
Think of a wonderful thought—
Any merry little thought.
Think of Christmas, think of snow.
Think of sleigh bells, off you go,
Like reindeer in the sky!

FEMALE CHORUS
In the sky!

FEMALE SOLOIST
You can fly!

FEMALE CHORUS
Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly! Fly!
You can fly! (Fly! Fly! Fly!)
You can fly!

(Music changes back to “Baroque Hoedown”)

FEMALE SOLOIST
You can fly!
You can fly!

FEMALE CHORUS
You can fly!

(Large TIGGER, GENIE, and LUMIERE puppets pass by.)

FEMALE SOLOIST
Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
Kick your heels up when you join the fun.
As the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
I gotta know…

CHORUS
When can we do this again?

(Monsters, Inc. float passes by with SULLY at the helm and several doors opening and closing to reveal other monsters. MIKE WAZOWSKI brings up the rear. Music changes to saxophone version of “Baroque Hoedown.”)

ABOBINABLE SNOWMAN
Welcome to the Himalayas!

LIBRARIAN
Shh! Quiet!

MONSTERS
2319!

SAFETY ANNOUNCER
George Sanderson, please remain motionless.

GEORGE SANDERSON
Get it off! Get it off!

(Music changes to “If I Didn’t Have You.”)

MIKE WAZOWSKI
Okay, cut!

(Music changes back to “Baroque Hoedown.”)

CHORUS
Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
Kick your heels up when you join the fun.
As the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?
(Whoa-oh-oh-oh.)
I never want this to end!
(Whoa-oh-oh-oh.)
When can we do this again?
(Whoa-oh-oh-oh.)
I gotta know,
(I gotta know)
When can we do this again?

(Car tires screech as Cars float begins to pass by. Music adds notes of “Life is a Highway” to “Baroque Hoedown.”)

MALE SOLOIST
Life is a highway!
I wanna ride it all night long.
If you’re goin’ my way,
I wanna drive it all night long.

(LIGHTNING MCQUEEN and MACK are flanked by dancers. DJ is hitched to the back of MACK.)

CHORUS
On Route 66!
Get your kicks on Route 66!

Life is a highway!
I wanna ride it all night long.
On Route 66!

(Music changes to calypso version of “When Can I See You Again?,” interspersed with “Under the Sea.” Scat solos and steel drums throughout. Ariel’s theme plays. Music changes to steel drum version of “Under the Sea” as The Little Mermaid float passes by. ARIEL, FLOUNDER, and SEBASTIAN sit in front of KING TRITON.)

CHORUS
La, la, la, la, etc.
Ah ah ah, etc.

ARIEL (Ad Lib)
Hello everyone! Flounder, look at the humans, etc.

(Finding Nemo puppets pass by.)

FEMALE SOLOIST
Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
And kick your heels up when you join the fun.
And as the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
I gotta know…

CHORUS
When can we do this again?

(Toy Story float passes by. BUZZ LIGHTYEAR and WOODY ride atop a giant SLINKY DOG. JESSIE dances in front.)

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
Star Command, this is Buzz Lightyear. I’m detecting huge quantities of extremely colorful lights.

WOODY
Yee-haw! Look sharp, everybody!

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
The number of crystallic fusion cells it takes to power this event must be immense!

WOODY
Yessir, I’d say this is quite a colorful night.

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
My sensors indicate an overabundance of bright lights! To infinity and beyond!

FEMALE SOLOIST
You got a friend in me!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
You got a friend in me!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.
Just remember what your old pal said:
Boy, you’ve got a friend in me!

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
Stand back, everyone. Wow, these lights are incredible—like they’re from another galaxy.

CHORUS
Buzz Lightyear!
Buzz Lightyear!

WOODY
Reach for the sky! Ride like the wind, Slink, hahaha!

MALE SOLOIST
We belong together!
We belong together!

CHORUS
You can fly!

WOODY
Well, howdy partner!

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
Fascinating. Everyone here is taking part in the celebration.

(Princess float approaches.)

CHORUS
Hello. Hello. Hello.
I wanna know,
When can we do this again?

(BELLE leads the float in a giant dress. Music switches between “Baroque Hoedown,” “A Dream Is a Wish Your Heart Makes,” “I See the Light,” and “Beauty and the Beast.” RAPUNZEL and CINDERELLA dance on their own floats.)

FEMALE SOLOIST
Tale as old as time,
Song as old as rhyme,
Beauty and the Beast!

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
And at last I see the light!

FEMALE SOLOIST
A dream is a wish…

FEMALE SOLOIST
Beauty and the Beast.

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
And at last I see the light!

FEMALE SOLOIST
A dream is a wish your heart makes.

FEMALE SOLOIST
Beauty and the Beast.

FEMALE SOLOIST
Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
Kick your heels up when you join the fun.
And as the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Ooo-whoa! Ooo-whoa!

FEMALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end!

CHORUS
Ooo-whoa! Ooo-whoa!

FEMALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Ooo-whoa! Ooo-whoa!

FEMALE SOLOIST
I gotta know,
When can we do this again?

(Music mixes “Let it Go” into “Baroque Hoedown.” Frozen float passes by, with ANNA and ELSA standing in a tower.)

CHORUS
Whoa, whoa, etc.
La la la, etc.

FEMALE SOLOIST
Do you wanna build a snowman?

Let it go, let it go!
Can’t hold it back anymore!
Let it go, let it go!

(Music plays “For the First Time in Forever” theme and then abruptly changes to “In Summer.”)

ANNA and ELSA (Ad Lib)
I bet Olaf likes all these pretty colors. Oh Elsa, I’m so happy to share this with you. What a wonderful celebration, etc.

(OLAF passes by on the back of the float.)

CHORUS
For the first time in forever!
(Let it go! Let it go!)
For the first time in forever!
(Let it go!)
Nothing’s in my way.

(Final floats pass by with GOOFY, DONALD, MINNIE, and SORCERER MICKEY.)

MALE SOLOIST
Put your hands up, ’cause the night is young!
Kick your heels up when you join the fun.
As the magic sets us all aglow,
I gotta know, my friends,
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end!

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

MALE SOLOIST
I gotta know…

CHORUS
When can we do this again?

SORCERER MICKEY
Wow, this is great! Gosh, would ya look at all these colors? Wow! This is amazing! Fantastic!

CHORUS
Who’s the leader of the club that’s made for you and me?
M-I-C-K-E-Y
M-O-U-S-E!

SORCERER MICKEY
That’s me! This sure is fun. (Chuckles.)

CHORUS
M-I-C-K-E-Y
M-O-U-S-E!
Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!

FEMALE SOLOIST
Zip-a-dee-ay!

CHORUS
My, oh, my…

MALE SOLOIST
What a wonderful day!

CHORUS
Plenty of sunshine…

FEMALE SOLOIST
Headin’ my way.

CHORUS
Zip-a-dee-doo-dah!

MALE SOLOIST
Zip-a-dee-ay!

CHORUS
When you wish upon a star,
(M-I-C-K-E-Y)
Makes no difference who you are!
(M-O-U-S-E!)

(As the parade comes to an end, “Baroque Hoedown” is scatted by a cappella singers while soloists and chorus echo with lyrics.)

FEMALE SOLOIST
When can we do this again?

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh.

FEMALE SOLOIST
I never want this to end.

CHORUS
Whoa-oh-oh-oh

When can we do this again?
(M-I-C-K-E-Y
M-O-U-S-E!)

When can we do this again?!

(Parade music ends.)

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Adventure Thru Inner Space (Disneyland) – 1967-1985

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(Queue Announcements.)

CONTROLLER 1
Atommobiles approaching snowflake specimen. All phases stand by to verify resolving power…

CONTROLLER 2
Phase Blue! Phase Blue! Light wavelength approximately .5000 millimeters. Definition excellent.

CONTROLLER 3
Phase Green! Resolving power decreasing.

CONTROLLER 1
Phase Green! Increase hue angle. Verify.

CONTROLLER 3
Phase Green: hue angle increased to 14 degrees, 29 minutes. Atommobile definition: excellent.

CONTROLLER 1
All phases hold hue angle until forward units reach crystalline stage of snowflake.

NARRATOR (PAUL FREES)
Your attention, please! This is the tracking procedure of an adventure through inner space. Adventurous men of science who have made this journey before you are carefully plotting every phase of this incredible journey as you shrink beyond the smallness of an atom—the smallest building block of matter. We wish you an enlightening experience. For, though your body will shrink, your mind will expand.

CONTROLLER 1
All phases, lower resolvable separation as Atommobiles proceed through crystalline stage. Compensate shrinking factor.

CONTROLLER 3
Phase Yellow: hue angle increased to 85 degrees—approaching practical limit.

CONTROLLER 1
Phase Yellow, hold at 90 degrees and stand by to convert to immersion fluids.

NARRATOR
You are about to begin your adventure through inner space. We hope this remarkable journey will bring you closer to the adventures experienced daily by men of science—men of vision who make similar treks in a never-ending search for new ways to manipulate molecules for your comfort and convenience. This journey which you are about to take is but one of many such marvelous adventures through inner space.

CONTROLLER 1
Forward units proceeding beyond limits of optical magnification. All phases activate DLX system. Verify voltage compensators.

CONTROLLER 2
Phase Blue: DLX system go. Focusing on H2O molecules. Advanced Atommobiles obscured.

CONTROLLER 1
All primary phases pinpoint C.C. factor of condenser coil—verify triangulation.

CONTROLLER 2
Phase Blue: C.C. factor rectified. Advanced Atommobiles coming into focus.

CONTROLLER 1
All phases lock on to present C.C. factor and hold until all Atommobiles passed beyond DLX range.

NARRATOR
Ladies and gentlemen, on this adventure through inner space, you will see that the crystal is a basic form of solid mater. You will see that crystals are made of millions of molecules; that molecules are composed of one or more atoms; and that atoms consist of a nucleus and many electrons that surround it. Here you will see just two of more than a hundred known atoms that scientists are constantly rearranging into molecules to further what nature began.

CONTROLLER 1
All phases, initiate the M.S. precision converters and adjust to the minus 20 million.

CONTROLLER 3
Phase Yellow. Phase Yellow reporting forward units on collision course with H20 molecule

CONTROLLER 1
Increase precision focus to the minus one billion.

CONTROLLER 4
Phase Orange! Forward units obscured. Cannot, repeat, cannot locate Atommobiles.

CONTROLLER 1
All phases increase focus to the minus five billion. Proceed with precision scan procedure.

CONTROLLER 4
Phase Orange: oxygen atoms in sharp focus. Still no evidence of Atommobiles.

CONTROLLER 1
Critical phases continue precision scan procedure.

NARRATOR
Your ultimate goal on this adventure thru inner space will be the very hub of this microcosmic solar system—the atomic nucleus. Its capabilities are almost unimaginable. It is a million times smaller than the atom, and yet it contains 99 percent of the atom’s weight. The density of the nucleus is such that if we had one cubic centimeter—half a teaspoon—it would weigh one hundred million tons. We hope this adventure will stimulate your interest to probe further into the mysteries of inner space. For everything we use in our daily lives depends on the universe of the molecule.

CONTROLLER 4
Phase Orange! Phase Orange experiencing chromatic aberrations. Request permission to increase object space index.

CONTROLLER 1
Phase Orange: permission granted. Make adjustments and verify.

CONTROLLER 4
Phase Orange: immersion fluid padded. Objective positive. Atommobiles observed approaching crystal labyrinth.

CONTROLLER 5
Phase Red. Reporting forward units drifting into molecular stage. N.A. factor approaching one point forty.

CONTROLLER 1
Phase Red, hold at N.A. one point sixty. Attention all phases: Atommobiles proceeding beyond limits of normal optical magnification. Stand by to convert to DLX system when forward units enter molecular stage.

NARRATOR
Manned flights to Mars and beyond—the glamorous probing of outer space—may one day benefit all mankind. But it is today’s dedicated probing of inner space that will make it possible. It is man’s probing into the realm of the atom and the molecule that has developed the sophisticated materials that will enable our astronauts to survive the rigors of outer space.

(Guests board omnimover vehicles.)

SAFETY ANNOUNCER
The front panel will close automatically. Please remain seated at all times.

(Ride motion begins.)

(Attraction narration.)

NARRATOR
For centuries, man had but his own two eyes to explore the wonders of his world. Then, he invented the microscope—a mighty eye—and discovered the fantastic universe beyond the limits of his own meager sight.

Now, your adventure thru inner space has begun. Thru Monsanto’s Mighty Microscope, you will travel into the incredible universe found within a tiny fragment of a snowflake. I am the first person to make this fabulous journey—suspended in the timelessness of inner space are the thought waves of my first impressions. They will be our only source of contact once you have passed beyond the limits of normal—

ECHOING VOICE
MAGNIFICATION. MAGNIFICATION. MAGNIFICATION. MAGNIFICATION.

NARRATOR
I am passing beyond the magnification limits of even the most powerful microscope. These are snowflakes, and yet they seem to grow larger and larger—or can I be shrinking? Shrinking beyond the smallness of a tiny snowflake crystal. Indeed, I am becoming smaller and smaller!

These tiny bits of snowflake crystal tower above me—like an enormous wall of ice! Can I penetrate this gigantic prism? And yet, this wall of ice only seems smooth and solid. From this tiny viewpoint, I can see that nothing is solid—no matter how it appears.

And still I continue to shrink. What compelling force draws me into this mysterious darkness? Can this be the threshold of inner space?

What are these strange spheres? Have I reached the universe of the molecule? Yes! These are water molecules—H20! They vibrate in such an orderly pattern, because this is water frozen into a solid state of matter.

These fuzzy spheres must be the atoms that make up the molecule. Two hydrogen atoms bonded to a single oxygen atom. And I see it’s the orbiting electrons that give the atom its fuzzy appearance.

And still I continue to shrink. Is it possible that I can enter the atom itself?

Electrons are dashing about me—like so many fiery comets! Can I possibly survive?!

I have pierced the wall of the oxygen atom! I am so infinitely small now that I can see millions of orbiting electrons. They appear like the Milky Way of our own solar system. This vast realm… this is the infinite universe within a tiny speck of snowflake crystal.

And there is the nucleus of the atom! Do I dare explore the vastness of its inner space?

No—I dare not go on. I must return to realm of the molecule before I go on shrinking… forever!

Oh, how strange! The molecules are so active now. They have become fluid—freed from their frozen state. That can only mean that the snowflake is melting.

Yes, the snowflake has melted. But there is no cause for alarm. You are back on visual and returning to your normal size.

This has been one of many exciting adventures thru inner space, in a never-ending search for new ways to rearrange molecules for the benefit of mankind.

Now, in our display area you will see modern miracles created by rearranging the molecules of not only water, but of air, coal, petroleum, and many other raw materials.

This is Monsanto.

SAFETY ANNOUNCER
When the automatic front panel opens, please step out to your right.

(Music for “Miracles from Molecules” by Richard and Robert Sherman begins.)

CHORUS
Miracles from molecules
Are dawning every day.
Discoveries for happiness
In a fabulous array.

A never-ending search is on
By men who dare and plan.
Making modern miracles
From molecules for man.

Every atom is a world,
An infinity unfurled,
A world of inner space without an end.
A world of mystery,
Of endless energy,
With treasures more than man can ever spend.

Miracles from molecules
Are dawning every day.
Discoveries for happiness
In a fabulous array.

A never-ending search is on
By men who dare and plan.
Making modern miracles
From molecules for man.

Making modern miracles
From molecules for man.

(Guests exit ride vehicles and enter post-show area.)

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A Christmas Fantasy Parade (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

ANNOUNCER
Ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls: it’s time to share the magic of the merriest season of all, as Disney proudly presents A Christmas Fantasy!

(Music begins with fanfare.)

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

On this special holiday,
Old Saint Nick will load his sleigh.
Santa always finds his way
In a Christmas fantasy.

Children sing a bright encore,
Counting presents and keeping score.
No one sleeps the night before
A Christmas fantasy!

(Toy soldiers play the parade theme on their trumpets and drums.)

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

(Music ends and then begins again.)

MICKEY MOUSE
Happy holidays to one and all!

MINNIE MOUSE
Merry Christmas, everyone! Oh, this is such a wonderful time of year!

MICKEY MOUSE
And how! It’s my favorite season.

MINNIE MOUSE
Just look at all these toys!

MICKEY MOUSE
Santa’s gonna need a whole lot of help this year. C’mon, everybody!

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.

MINNIE MOUSE
Why hello! Hello, everyone!

CHORUS
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

MINNIE MOUSE
Oh Mickey, look at all these Christmas wishes!

MICKEY MOUSE
(Chuckles)

CHORUS
On this special holiday,
Old Saint Nick will load his sleigh.

MINNIE MOUSE
(Kissing noise)

MICKEY MOUSE
Hey, over here!

CHORUS
Santa always finds his way
In a Christmas fantasy.

MINNIE MOUSE
My, what fun little helpers you are!

Children sing a bright encore,
Counting presents and keeping score.

MINNIE MOUSE
Gosh, how wonderful!

MICKEY MOUSE
(Chuckles)

CHORUS
No one sleeps the night before
A Christmas fantasy!

ELVES
How much longer?
Oh, how much longer
‘Til Christmas? Christmas!
How much longer?
Oh, how, ’til Christmas Day?

MINNIE MOUSE
Happy holidays!

MICKEY MOUSE
Oh boy! Merry Christmas!

ELVES
You better watch out,
You better not cry.
Better not pout,
I’m telling you why:
Santa Claus is coming to town!

MINNIE MOUSE
How exciting!

ELVES
He’s making a list,
Checkin’ it twice.
Gonna find out
Who’s naughty and nice.
Santa Claus is coming to town!

FEMALE ELVES
He sees you when you’re sleeping.
He knows when you’re awake.

MICKEY MOUSE
He knows!

MALE ELVES
He knows if you’ve been bad or good,
So be good for goodness sake!

MICKEY MOUSE
(Chuckles)

ELVES
Oh, you better watch out.
You better not cry.
Better not pout,
I’m telling you why:
Santa Claus is coming to town!

MICKEY MOUSE
Happy holidays!

MINNIE MOUSE
Merry Christmas!

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

(Music ends and then begins again.)

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

A wonderland in winter’s light,
A sleigh ride in the chill of night.
Our holiday turns snowy white
In a Christmas fantasy!

(Music turns to “Sleigh Ride,” “Frosty the Snowman,” and “Let It Snow.”)

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

(Music ends and then begins again.)

OLAF
Hi everyone! I’m Olaf, and I like warm hugs. Oh, everyone’s so festive. Hello! Hello! And happy holidays to you and you.

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.

OLAF
Happy holidays!

CHORUS
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be

OLAF
Hi! How are you?!

CHORUS
Part of Christmas fantasy.

OLAF
Hi there! I’m so happy to see you!

CHORUS
On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might…

OLAF
Happy holidays!

CHORUS
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

OLAF
How you doin’? Things good? Good. Good for you! Me too… me too. Oh—looks like I gotta go. Bye!

CHORUS
A wonderland in winter’s light,
A sleigh ride in the chill of night.
Our holiday turns snowy white
In a Christmas fantasy!

OLAF
Happy holidays. Don’t you just love this time of year? It’s so fun to play in the snow. Hey—I’ve got an idea! Everybody give yourself a big, warm hug—oh, and say it’s from me! All this waving’s making my arms tired… Just kidding! I could do this all day. Hi there. What ya doin’? Me? I’m just hangin’ around. Ooh, everyone looks so cuddly and warm! Hi there. Glad you could be here—it just wouldn’t be the same without you. Sometimes, when my head falls off, it’s like my whole world turns upside-down.

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

OLAF
Happy holidays! Oh, oh boy. Hands down, this is the best time of year!

(Music ends and then begins again.)

GOOFY
Gawrsh, I always wanted to build a gingerbread house—and this one’s big enough to live in! Talk about goin’ home for the holidays. (Laughs.)

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
You bet, Pluto! Time to get to decoratin’!

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!

GOOFY
(Hums and laughs.)

CHORUS
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

GOOFY
Hey, everything okay up there, Pluto?

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
Okey-dokey!

CHORUS
On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might…

GOOFY
Don’t you just love the holidays? It’s the sweetest time of year!

CHORUS
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

Peppermints and lollipops,

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
You got it Pluto. More gumdrops coming right up!

CHORUS
Gingerbread and lemon drops.
It’s all free at the candy shop
In a Christmas fantasy!

GOOFY
Anybody thinking of making a gingerbread house? Well, take it from Chef Goofy—you gotta start with yummy ingredients.

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
Yup! And a good recipe. And a baker’s eye for arranging your treats just so. Wow, just look out there, Pluto.

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
You got that right, boy. A whole bunch of future bakers as far as the eye can see. Oh hey there! How ya doin’?

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
You can say that again, Pluto!

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
So, what do you think? How’s that look, Pluto?

PLUTO
(Barks.)

GOOFY
I couldn’t have said it better myself. This is one gingerbread house that looks too good to eat! (Guffaws.)

PLUTO
(Barks.)

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.

GOOFY
Hi there! How ya doin’? We sure are happy to see ya!

CHORUS
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

GOOFY
Hey everybody—bein’ here with you is my favorite part of the holidays! Happy holidays, everybody! (Guffaws.)

(Music ends and then begins again.)

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

A ballroom dance with yuletide flair
Puts love and romance in the air!
A mistletoe kiss we share
In a Christmas fantasy.

PRINCES AND PRINCESSES
Sing songs of gladness and cheer!
The time of Christmas is here!
Look around about you and see
What a world of wonder this world can be!

Sing a Christmas carol!
Sing a Christmas carol!
Sing a Christmas carol,
Like the children do.

And enjoy the beauty
Of the joy and beauty.
That a merry Christmas
Can bring to you!

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

(Music ends and then begins again with a trumpet solo replacing the chorus.)

WOODY
Ho-ho-ho-hold on there, horsey! I know. I know—time to ride like the wind and holler, “Merry Christmas!” Well, let’s go!

Okay, okay, listen up, everyone. I just had a meeting with all the toys, and we decided this is gonna be the merriest Christmas ever. That’s right—no toy left behind, got it? Okay!

CHORUS
On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

WOODY
I can’t wait to meet the new toys this year!

A factory that Santa runs.
With elves who play and make it fun.
Lots of toys for everyone,
In a Christmas fantasy.

WOODY
Now remember, everyone—toys were made for playtime. So get out there and have fun! Yeehaw! I’ve always wanted to ride in Santa’s sleigh. Oh, yeah! We’re gonna reach for the sky all right! It’s Christmastime! That’s right—the toys are back and better than ever. Whoa-ho-ho-ho!

CHORUS
The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

WOODY
Merry Christmas! Happy holidays!

(Music ends and then begins again.)

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
Greetings, Space Rangers. Your mission: have as much fun as a barrel of monkeys!

CHORUS
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
I am Buzz Lightyear. I come in peace. And at this time of year, peace is standard issue!

CHORUS
On this very special night,
We wish we may, we wish we might
Have the wish we wish tonight
In a Christmas fantasy!

A factory that Santa runs.
With elves who play and make it fun.
Lots of toys for everyone,
In a Christmas fantasy.

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
I seem to have landed in a strange place, but sensors indicate the atmosphere here is perfect… for having fun! Does Santa really travel across this planet all in one night? His sleigh must have some sort of crystallic fusion! Have you seen the jolly man in the red suit? He’s obviously the commander of this impressive assembly line!

The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

BUZZ LIGHTYEAR
To Santa’s workshop, and beyond! Space Rangers—happy holidays!

(Music ends and then begins again.)

CHORUS
It’s a special magic at Christmastime this year.
Hearts are gay and merry, and full of yuletide cheer!
The sprit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you.

With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

On this special holiday,
Old Saint Nick will load his sleigh.
Santa always finds his way
In a Christmas fantasy.

Sugar plums and candy canes,
A sleigh ride down a snowy lane,
Carolers sing a bright refrain.
Come and sing along with me!

Jingle Bells, jingle bells,
Jingle all the way.
Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh, hey!

Jingle bells, jingle bells,
Jingle all the way.
Oh, what fun it is to ride
In a one-horse open sleigh!

Deck the halls with boughs of holly,
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!
‘Tis the season to be jolly,
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!

Don we now our gay apparel,
Fa-la-la, la-la-la, la-la-la.
Troll the ancient yuletide carol,
Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la!

We wish you a Merry Christmas.
We wish you a Merry Christmas.
We wish you a Merry Christmas,
And a Happy New Year!

SANTA CLAUS (ad lib)
Ho-ho-ho! Merry Christmas to you! You’ve all been good this year. May all your dreams come true. And a Happy New Year, etc.

The spirit of the season will make our dreams come true.
Memories of Christmas are here for me and you!
With caroling, bells ring-a-ling,
And Santa Claus will always be
Part of Christmas fantasy.

(Parade ends.)

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Live the Magic Lyrics – Disneyland Forever Exit Music (Disneyland)

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(Disneyland Forever Fireworks end. “Kiss Goodnight” post-show ends. Exit music begins: “Live the Magic”)

FEMALE SOLOIST
It’s a world where you belong,
Where you can dream aloud.
Your heart will follow!

Get up, and sing along!
The moment’s here and now,
Inside we all know!

If we believe in the fantasy,
It will carry us away, carry us away.
You and me, makin’ memories today.

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
Step into the magic.
Watch the stories come to life!
This is a celebration.
Every color shines so bright.

Turn on your light!
Come on, and live the magic.
So much to find.

FEMALE SOLOIST
Come on, and live the magic!

MALE SOLOIST
We can dance, and we can dream,
So come along with me!

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
We shine together!

FEMALE SOLOIST
No tellin’ what we’ll see,
Right where we wanna be…

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
There’s nothin’ better.

If we believe in the fantasy,
It will carry us away, carry us away.
You and me, makin’ memories today.

Step into the magic.
Watch the stories come to life!
This is a celebration.
Every color shines so bright.

Turn on your light!
Come on, and live the magic.
So much to find.
Come on, and live the magic.

FEMALE SOLOIST
Where we’re dreamin’, here together…

MALE AND FEMALE SOLOISTS
Under a diamond sky,
There’s a feelin’ that brings our hearts to life!

Step into the magic.
Watch the stories come to life!
This is a celebration.
Every color shines so bright.

Turn on your light!
Come on, and live the magic.
So much to find.
Come on, and live the magic.

Come on, and live the magic.
Live the magic.

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Kiss Goodnight Lyrics – Disneyland Forever Post-Show (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

(Disneyland Forever Fireworks end. Post-show music begins: “Kiss Goodnight” by Richard Sherman.)

NARRATOR
We hope you enjoyed Disneyland Forever, and we’d like to leave you with one more magical thought. Walt Disney wanted the nightly fireworks to be like a kiss goodnight—a little bit of pixie dust to end your visit to this Magic Kingdom. It’s a tradition we honor and cherish to this day. And so, we wish you a lifetime of dreams come true and hope you always remember your special “Kiss Goodnight” at the Happiest Place on Earth.

SOLOIST (ASHLEY BROWN)
To the land of imagination,
There’s a wondrous magical door.
No one knows where the door is hidden,
Yet we’ve all been there before.

For within every heart lies a secret
That reveals a mystery.
And the secret is this,
Just a gentle kiss is the key.

A kiss goodnight
Is the doorway to Dreamland.
A kiss goodnight
Is where memories begin.

Just close your eyes,
And you’ll see where your fantasies dwell.
To your surprise,
What a fabulous tale they tell.

A kiss goodnight
Is the start of a journey
To deep in your heart,
Where your memories shine.

Oh, the joy and the wonder you feel on a magical flight
Begins with a kiss goodnight.

A kiss goodnight
Is the doorway to Dreamland.
A kiss goodnight
Is where memories begin.

Just close your eyes,
And you’ll see where your fantasies dwell.
To your surprise,
What a fabulous tale they tell.

A kiss goodnight
Is the start of a journey
To deep in your heart,
Where your memories shine.

Oh, the joy and the wonder you feel on a magical flight
Begins with a kiss goodnight.
It begins with a kiss goodnight!

(Exit music begins: “Live the Magic.”)

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Mickey and Friends Tram (Disneyland Resort)

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(Tram pulls up to the loading area at the Mickey and Friends Parking Structure.)

ANNOUNCER
Hello everyone! Welcome aboard the Mickey and Friends Tram. Please lower your head and watch your step while boarding.  Please place young children toward the inside of the tram—away from the sides. There may be no lap sitting, except for very young children who are sitting with their parents. Children may not ride in strollers. Strollers should be folded and safety stored before we leave.  As a courtesy to other passengers, we ask that there be no eating, drinking, or smoking on board. In just a few moments, we will begin our trip to the Disneyland Resort Main Entrance Plaza. Thank you.

(CONDUCTOR announces final boarding call and “no more boarding at this time.”)

ANNOUNCER
For your safety,  remain seated with the doors closed—keeping your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside while the tram is moving—and supervise your children.

SPANISH SAFETY ANNOUNCER
Para su seguridad, favor de permanecer sentados con las puertas cerradas, manteniendo su manos, brazos, pies, y piernas adentro mientras el tranvía esta moviendo. Y vigilen a sus niños. Gracias.

CONDUCTOR (Exact wording varies.)
Ladies and gentlemen, this tram is ready to depart. Driver, you are clear.

(Tram begins moving.)

ANNOUNCER
Please hold on to hats, glasses, or any loose items that may fall from the tram. If an article should fall, please stay seated until the next stop, and inform the nearest cast member. Thank you.

(CONDUCTOR makes current announcements and tells the driver when the turn is clear.)

ANNOUNCER
We are now en route to the Disneyland Resort Main Entrance Plaza—gateway to Disneyland Park, Disney California Adventure Park, and the Downtown Disney District. If you are here just for the  day, our One-Day Park Hopper Ticket offers same-day admission to both Disneyland and Disney California Adventure. If you have  more time to spend, multi-day tickets and annual passes are an especially good value.

Before entering the parks, we’d like to remind you that smoking is not permitted. except in designated areas. If you have brought your own food or beverage, please use the picnic area located just to the left of the Disneyland main entrance. If you plan to leave the park and return later today, please keep your ticket and have your hand stamped as you exit.

(CONDUCTOR makes announcement with the day’s hours for each park.)

ANNOUNCER
Just ahead is the  Downtown Disney District, with exciting shopping, dining, and live entertainment. Just beyond it is Disney’s Grand Californian Hotel and Spa—inspired by the famed Arts and Crafts movement in California.

We are now  approaching the Main Entrance Plaza. At the end of your visit, please return here to take the Mickey and Friends Tram back to the parking area. The trams will continue running until one hour after the latest park closing time.

Please stay seated with the doors closed until the tram comes to a full stop. Then gather your belongings, watch your step, and exit to the driver’s right. Thanks for traveling with us today, and we hope you have a happy and memorable visit to the Disneyland Resort!

(Trams arrive at their stop. CONDUCTOR makes another announcement about exiting to the driver’s right-hand side. Guests exit, and the tram drives forward to the pickup location for new guests.)

ANNOUNCER
Hello, everyone! This is the Mickey and Friends Tram—traveling to the parking structure and the Pinocchio Parking Lot. Please lower your head and watch your step while boarding. Please place young children toward the inside of the tram—away from the sides. There may be no lap sitting, except for very young children who are sitting with their parents. Children may not ride in strollers. Strollers should be folded and safety stored before we leave.  As a courtesy to other passengers, we ask that there be no eating, drinking, or smoking on board. As a reminder, this is the Mickey and  Friends Tram—serving the parking structure and the Pinocchio Parking Area. Thank you! We will begin our trip shortly.

(CONDUCTOR announces final boarding call and “no more boarding at this time.”)

ANNOUNCER
For your safety,  remain seated with the doors closed—keeping your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside while the tram is moving—and supervise your children.

SPANISH SAFETY ANNOUNCER
Para su seguridad, favor de permanecer sentados con las puertas cerradas, manteniendo su manos, brazos, pies, y piernas adentro mientras el tranvía esta moviendo. Y vigilen a sus niños. Gracias.

CONDUCTOR (Exact wording varies.)
Ladies and gentlemen, this tram is ready to depart. Driver, you are clear.

(Tram begins moving.)

ANNOUNCER
Please hold on to hats, glasses, or any loose items that may fall from the tram. If an article should fall, please stay seated until the next stop, and inform the nearest cast member. Thank you.

If you will be returning to the park later today, please keep your ticket and show your hand stamp to re-enter. If you will be leaving the guest parking area and returning later today,  just show today’s parking ticket to re-enter the parking area.

As you travel through our resort, we’d like to remind you that our guest parking areas have a speed limit of 14 miles per hour. We ask that you please observe this speed limit and yield the right of way to Disneyland vehicles, whether you are walking or driving.

We are now  approaching the Mickey and Friends tram stop—which serves the Mickey and Friends Parking Structure  and the Pinocchio Parking Area. Please remain seated with the doors closed until the tram has come to a full stop. Then gather your belongings, lower your head, and watch your step—exiting to the driver’s left.

On behalf of all our cast members, we’d like to thank you for joining us today. Once in your car, please be sure to buckle up, and have a happy and safe journey home!

(Trams arrive at their stop. CONDUCTOR makes another announcement about exiting to the driver’s left-hand side. Guests exit.)

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Pirates of the Caribbean (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

(Loading area announcements.)

SAFETY ANNOUNCER
Ahoy there, crew! For your safety, remain seated, keeping your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the boat—and watch your children. And no flash pictures! Prepare to make sail!

(Spanish safety spiel.)

Ahoy mateys! For a safe voyage, remember to stay seated with your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the boat—and watch your children. And remember, no flash pictures! Now off with ya!

(Spanish safety spiel.)

(Ride begins. Boats float through bayou and past old man playing “Oh! Susannah” on the banjo.)

TALKING SKULL
Psst! Avast there! It be too late to alter course, mateys—and there be plunderin’ pirates lurkin’ in every cove, waitin’ to board. Sit closer together, and keep your ruddy hands inboard—that be the best way to repel boarders. And mark well me words, mateys: “Dead men tell no tales!”

Ye come seekin’ adventure and salty old pirates, eh? Sure, you come to the proper place. But keep a weather eye open, mates, and hold on tight—with both hands, if you please. There be squalls ahead! And Davy Jones waiting for them what don’t obey.

(Boats descend first drop.)

PIRATES
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle and loot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We kidnap and ravage and don’t give a hoot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Maraud and embezzle and even hijack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We kindle and char; inflame and ignite.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We burn up the city; we’re really a fright.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

We’re rascals and scoundrels. We’re villains and knaves.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.
We’re devils and black sheep. We’re really bad eggs.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We’re beggars and blighters and ne’er-do-well cads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Aye, but we’re loved by our mommies and dads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

(Boats descend second drop and proceed through grotto.)

OMINOUS VOICE
Dead men tell no tales. Dead men tell no tales, etc.

DAVY JONES
Ahahahaha! Aye, but tales there be aplenty in this cursed place.

OMINOUS VOICE
Dead men tell no tales.

DAVY JONES
Ah, but they do tell tales—so says I, Davy Jones.

OMINOUS VOICE
Dead men tell no tales.

DAVY JONES
If ye be brave or fool enough to face a pirates’ curse, proceed.

(Boats pass beneath DAVY JONES mist screen and into the midst of battle between the Wicked Wench—commanded by BARBOSSA—and the SPANISH SOLDIERS.)

BARBOSSA
Get on the broadside! Pound ’em, lads! Pound ’em!

SPANISH CAPTAIN
Barbossa, we’re going to sink your ship!

BARBOSSA
Captain Jack Sparrow—show yourself, you miserable cur!

SPANISH CAPTAIN
Fire! Fire!

BARBOSSA
Strike your colors, ya bloomin’ cockroaches! Surrender Cap’n Jack Sparrow—or, by thunder, we’ll burn this city to the ground!

SPANISH SOLDIER #1
(Yelling instructions.)

SPANISH SOLDIER #2
(Yelling instructions.)

BARBOSSA
Haha, they need a little persuasion, mateys. Fire at will!

SPANISH SOLDIER #1
Cuidado!

SPANISH SOLDIER #2
We’re not afraid of you!

BARBOSSA
It’s Cap’n Jack Sparrow we’re after—and a fortune in gold.

SPANISH CAPTAIN
Barbossa!

BARBOSSA
Put up your white flag, ya scurvy scum. Bring me Cap’n Jack Sparrow, or I’ll be sendin’ ya to Davy Jones!

SPANISH SOLDIER #1
You will never take the fort!

SPANISH CAPTAIN
We will never surrender!

(Boats round a corner to see a CAPTOR PIRATE instructing his LACKEY PIRATE to dunk CARLOS, the town magistrate, in an effort to make him talk. Meanwhile, CARLOS’ WIFE watches from the window of their home above. A MUSICIAN PIRATE plays the flute. CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW can be seen hiding next to the scene.)

Photo credit: Kent Buckingham

Photo credit: Kent Buckingham

CAPTOR PIRATE
Pipe the lubber aloft, matey. Where be Cap’n Jack Sparrow and the treasure, ya bilge rat?!

CARLOS’ WIFE
Don’t tell him, Carlos! No, no, no, no!

(RIFLE PIRATE shoots at her. She screams and disappears behind the shutter.)

RIFLE PIRATE
Hahaha, scuttle, ya bilge rat!

CARLOS (Getting dunked)
No! No! I’ll talk! No! No! No!

CAPTOR PIRATE
Take him aloft again, matey!

CARLOS’ WIFE
Be brave, Carlos! Don’t listen to him!

(RIFLE PIRATE shoots at her again, laughs.)

CAPTOR PIRATE
Where be Cap’n Jack Sparrow? Speak up—or do you fancy a swim with Davy Jones?!

CARLOS’ WIFE
Don’t tell him, Carlos! Don’t be chee-cken!

(RIFLE PIRATE shoots at her again. CARLOS gets dunked.)

CARLOS
I am no chee-cken! I will not talk!

(He gets dunked again and gurgles.)

(Boats move to auction scene, where AUCTIONEER attempts to sell captured women as brides to PIRATES.)

Photo credit: KGS Imaging

Photo credit: KGS Imaging

AUCTIONEER
We anchor, now, ye swabbies? What be I offered for this winsome wench? Stout-hearted and corn-fed she be.

DRUNK PIRATE
Hey! Be ya sellin’ her by the pound?

AUCTIONEER
Shift yer cargo, dearie. Show ’em yer larboard side!

DRUNK PIRATE
We wants the redhead!

AUCTIONEER
Allay there, you fo’c’s’le swab!

DRUNK PIRATE
The redhead!

SLURRING PIRATE
We wants the redhead!

ARMED PIRATE
Avast there! (Fires a gunshot.)

AUCTIONEER
And now, ya bilge rats—do I hear six? Who makes it six?

DRUNK PIRATE
Six it be. Six bottles o’ rum!

(Other PIRATES laugh.)

AUCTIONEER
I’m not spongin’ for rum! It be gold I’m after. Strike your colors, ya brazen wench. No need to expose your superstructure!

SLURRING PIRATE
You waiting for? C’mon now! We wants the redhead!

ALL PIRATES
We wants the redhead!

ARMED PIRATE
Quiet, ya scum! (Fires a shot to shut them up.)

(Boats go under bridge to chase scene. MAP PIRATE sits on a barrel with the treasure map spread across his lap and key in his hand. CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW pops out from the barrel behind him to look over his shoulder. DOG keeps barking whenever he appears.)

MAP PIRATE
Oh, it’s the treasure map for sure, and no mistake. And by thunder, that scoundrel Cap’n Jack Sparrow will never lay eyes on it—nor this here key neither, ha har. (DOG barks.) Quiet! Ha har, fooled him, I did, by gum! I tell you once, Cap’n Jack Sparrow—you’ll never find the treasure without a look at this here map… and this lovely key to the treasure room. Hahahaha! (DOG barks.) Easy boy. Here I be—holdin’ the treasure map, and the key as well. What I wouldn’t give to see the look on Cap’n Jack Sparrow’s face when he hears tell ’tis only me what’s got the goods, haha! (DOG barks.) Keep still! I’m studyin’ me map! (DOG barks.)

(Boats pass OLD BILL with two STRAY CATS.)

OLD BILL
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty! Hehehe, have a nice little tot of rum with Old Bill, eh? Hehehe… (CATS meow shrilly.) Come on, now—be a nice little pussycat! (He laughs and coughs.) Oh, you be a feisty one, you be. (CATS meow angrily.)

(Boats pass under another bridge and by PIRATE TRIO singing with DOG and DONKEY. Next, pass by the city being burned while PIRATES loot. Next, pass by MUDDY PIRATE snoring next to PIGS. Pass under another bridge, where HAIRY LEG PIRATE’s foot hangs down from above.)

PIRATES
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle and loot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We kidnap and ravage and don’t give a hoot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Maraud and embezzle and even hijack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We kindle and char; inflame and ignite.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We burn up the city; we’re really a fright.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

We’re rascals and scoundrels. We’re villains and knaves.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.
We’re devils and black sheep. We’re really bad eggs.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We’re beggars and blighters and ne’er-do-well cads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Aye, but we’re loved by our mommies and dads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

(Pass under another bridge and into jail scene. six JAIL PIRATES are in two jail cells—three to the LEFT and three to the RIGHT. Outside left cell, DOG WITH KEYS holds onto the keys to the cells. The JAIL PIRATES attempt to coax the key from him.)

LEFT PIRATE #1
Grab his tail! Go on, grab it!

LEFT PIRATE #2
Don’t scare him!

RIGHT PIRATE #1
There you go, dearie. Come on—have a nice bone, eh? That’s a good lad! Come on, now!

LEFT PIRATE #1
Oooh, steady now. Steady, steady. Here, that’s it. Take the keys off his ruddy neck.

RIGHT PIRATE #1
It’s us what needs your ruddy ‘elp, not them blasted lubbers!

RIGHT PIRATE #2
Oh, that blasted pocket-pickin’ pirate!

(LEFT PIRATE #3 whistles for the DOG.)

LEFT PIRATE #1
Bring Old Bill them nice keys!

RIGHT PIRATE #2
Blasted blackhearted cur!

LEFT PIRATE #2
Here you be, Spot. How’s about a nice, juicy bone?

LEFT PIRATE #1
Over ‘ere, Spot! Over ‘ere. Now, easy boy!

LEFT PIRATE #2
Here, give us the keys, you scrawny little beast!

RIGHT PIRATE #1
I say grab his ears.

(LEFT PIRATE #3 keeps whistling.)

LEFT PIRATE #2
Walk him over to the noose. Come on, now! Hold it higher. Higher, I say! Higher!

RIGHT PIRATE #1
Ugh, mangy mutt! Hit him with a soup bone!

LEFT PIRATE #1
Here, doggy. Here, here, doggy! Nice doggy!

RIGHT PIRATE #2
Belay that talk. We want the keys, not the mutt, you swab.

RIGHT PIRATE #1
Can’t you reach any further, you stub-winged bilge rat?

(Boats pass through room that is about to cave in, and then pass into a room where one SILLY PIRATE sits on a cannon across from THREE PIRATES who are fighting him. SILLY PIRATE sings his own version of the song, including laughs and interjections of “La la la la la!”)

Photo credit: Kent Buckingham

Photo credit: Kent Buckingham

PIRATES
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We pillage, we plunder, we rifle and loot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We kidnap and ravage and don’t give a hoot.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We extort, we pilfer, we filch and sack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Maraud and embezzle and even hijack.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We kindle and char; inflame and ignite.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
We burn up the city; we’re really a fright.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

We’re rascals and scoundrels. We’re villains and knaves.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.
We’re devils and black sheep. We’re really bad eggs.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.

Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!
We’re beggars and blighters and ne’er-do-well cads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Aye, but we’re loved by our mommies and dads,
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

(Boats begin climbing the hill and pass CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW sitting in the treasure room surrounded by gold and jewels.)

CAPTAIN JACK SPARROW
Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!

I raise a toast to all of our many shipmates lost at sea. Salut, mes amis!

Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Rascals and scoundrels; villains and knaves.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.
We’re devils and black sheep. We’re really bad eggs.
Drink up me hearties, yo ho.

Drink up, lads! There’s treasure enough for all. I shall take this paltry sum as a stipend to cover my expenses… and the chest of jewels.

Drink up me hearties, yo ho!
Yo ho, yo ho, a pirate’s life for me!

A toast to piracy, and its many shiny rewards. As a career, what could be more rewarding?

Drink up me hearties, yo ho!

I humbly accept this magnificent treasure as my reward for a life of villainy, larceny, skullduggery, and persnickety-ny.

(Boats continue up ramp.)

DAVY JONES
We will meet again when next you sail. So says I, Davy Jones!

BLACKBEARD
The fates have spoken and guided you well. ‘Til we meet again…

DAVY JONES
You may not survive to pass this way again! (Laughs.)

BLACKBEARD
Mark my words—we’ll meet again upon some stormy sea.

DAVY JONES
When next you sail, sail with Davy Jones. None shall escape. (Laughs.)

BLACKBEARD
On your way now. And tell the world you set sail with Blackbeard.

DAVY JONES
When next you sail, Davy Jones awaits. (Laughs.)

BLACKBEARD
The sea’s been kind today, but who can tell what dangers lie on stranger tides?

DAVY JONES
Mark my words—when next you sail, we’ll meet again! (Laughs.)

BLACKBEARD
You’ll stay, onward to the bitter end.

DAVY JONES
So it seems dead men do tell tales—don’t they? (Laughs.)

BLACKBEARD
The sea’s been kind today, but who can tell what dangers lie on tomorrow’s tide?

(Boats turn past attraction queue on left. PARROT sits aboard perch on right.)

PARROT
Ahoy there! (Squawk.) Thar she blows! (Whistle. Squawk.) Avast there, mateys! (Whistle.) Walk the plank! Walk the plank! (Laughs. Squawks.) Shiver me timbers! (Squawk.) Yo ho! Yo ho! (Squawks.) Dead men tell no tales. (Squawk. Whistle. Squawk.) Shiver me timbers! (Squawk.) Avast there, lubbers! (Squawk. Whistle.) Eight little coins! Eight little coins! (Whistle.) Steady as she goes! (Squawk. Whistle. Squawk.) Pieces of eight. (Squawk.) Pieces of eight. (Squawks.) Ahoy mateys. Ahoy! (Squawk. Whistle.)

(Boats approach unload zone.)

SAFETY ANNOUNCER
When the boat stops, please be steppin’ out to yer right.

All hands, prepare to go ashore by steppin’ out to yer right.

(Guests exit.)

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Disneyland Monorail (Disneyland)

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(Guests board at Tomorrowland Station.)

NARRATOR
Hello, everyone! Welcome aboard the Disneyland Monorail. We are now beginning a two-and-a-half mile journey to Downtown Disney Station and back. For a safe trip, remain seated, keeping your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the cabin. Be sure to watch your children—and no smoking, please.

(Spanish safety spiel.)

You are riding aboard the Mark VII—the latest generation of Disneyland monorails. When Walt Disney introduced this attraction in 1959, it was the first daily-operating monorail system in the Western Hemisphere.

Just ahead is Disney California Adventure, where you’ll find Disney stories told in unique and exciting new ways. That towering hotel in the distance is home to Twilight Zone Tower of Terror—where you can literally drop in on Hollywood history.

We are now passing Grizzly Peak: land of scenic wonders—where you can experience the beauty and exhilaration of free flight in Soarin’!

Coming into view is Disney’s Grand Californian Hotel and Spa. This Imagineering masterpiece is inspired by the state’s natural wonders and features the Arts and Crafts style of the 19th century.

We are now arriving at Downtown Disney Station—gateway to the Downtown Disney District and the Disneyland Resort hotels. If you will be leaving us here and returning later today, please hold on to your park ticket and have your hand stamped as you leave the station. You may re-board the monorail for a return trip to Tomorrowland up until one half-hour prior to Disneyland closing.

Please remain seated until the monorail comes to a complete stop, and the doors have opened. Then gather your belongings, lower your head, watch your step, and exit to the left of the monorail. Thanks for traveling with us today, and we hope you enjoy your visit to the Disneyland Resort!

For those of continuing with us, we’ll begin our return trip to Tomorrowland in just a few minutes. Thank you.

(Monorail stops at Downtown Disney Station. Guests exit and new guests board.)

To those of you who have just joined us, welcome aboard the Disneyland Monorail! For your safety, please remain seated, keeping your hands, arms, feet, and legs inside the cabin. Watch your children—and no smoking, please.

(Spanish safety spiel.)

We’re now en route to our final stop—the Tomorrowland Monorail Station. Along the way, you get a bird’s-eye look at the Downtown Disney District, Disney’s Grand Californian Resort and Spa, and Disney California Adventure.

To the left of the monorail is the main entrance of Disneyland—the Happiest Place on Earth! Disneyland is truly an American original. Since its opening in 1955, it has hosted hundreds of millions of guests from around the world—including presidents, kings, and celebrities. It is the original Disney theme park, created and enjoyed by Walt Disney himself.

To the right is our transportation plaza, where you’ll find taxis, hotel shuttles, and public transit stops.

We are about to enter Disneyland. Some of the clearances are pretty tight up ahead, so be sure to remain seated—keeping your hands and arms inside the cabin.

This is Tomorrowland—a land inspired by science fact and fantasy. Below us is the Submarine Lagoon, where you can dive into a fantastic underwater adventure aboard the Finding Nemo Submarine Voyage.

Across the way are the icy peaks of Matterhorn Mountain—home of the world’s most famous bobsled ride. And beneath us is the Autopia—where drivers of all ages travel the road to tomorrow.  As we cruise over Tomorrowland, our pilot would like to share a few program reminders.

PILOT
(Announces upcoming parades, fireworks, Fantasmic! showings, etc., as well as park closing time and the departure time of the last monorail.)

NARRATOR
To the right of the monorail, you just might spot the sparkling gold spires of one of Disney’s most beloved attractions, “it’s a small world”! And now, we’re riding alongside the happiest kingdom of them all: Fantasyland—home of Pinocchio, Snow White, Peter Pan, and other storybook characters.

Please remain seated until the monorail comes to a complete stop. Then collect your belongings, watch your head, and step carefully from the train. On behalf of all of our crew, thanks for traveling with us, and we hope you have a happy and memorable visit here at Disneyland. This is the Tomorrowland Monorail Station!

(Monorail stops in Tomorrowland. Guests exit.)

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Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

(Pre-show movie.)

NARRATOR
Aloha! And welcome to the natural beauty, wonder, and adventure of our islands. Every day, the gentle rain paints our landscapes with lush vegetation and a colorful variety of exotic flowers. Their alluring beauty and intoxicating fragrance fill our island paradise with enchantment. No less enchanting are the many varieties of brilliantly-colored tropical birds that entertain with delightful song. This incredible bounty of natural beauty was born of the blending of rich volcanic soil with the warm, tropical climate. Among our tasty treasures are flavorful fruits such as bananas, mangos, papayas, and of course, the pineapple. This king of fruits was once so rare and valuable that it was available only to kings. That is, until about a century ago, when a visionary came to our islands. Jim Dole’s idea of making our pineapple available to every family in America seemed, at the time, an impossible dream. But thanks to dedication and innovation, not only did his dream come true, but it grew into the largest producer of fruit in the world! Here in the islands, the pineapple is a symbol of hospitality. That is why it is always a part of the traditional island feast we call “pa’ina.” At a pa’ina, you’ll always find a happy gathering of friends and family—known here as ‘ohana. During these celebrations, our ‘ohana shares laughter, stories, and favorite recipes. And nothing brings out the taste of our tropical paradise like pineapple! So from our ‘ohana to yours, we invite you to enjoy this king of fruits and a taste of the islands wherever you call home. Aloha!

(Pre-show narration.)

MAUI
My name is Maui. Natives call me the Mighty One. I tamed the playful sun and gave my people time. Now they set their clocks by mine, for I am Tropic Standard Time.

KORO
Aloha! (Speaks Hawaiian.) I am Koro—Midnight Dancer. Today my magic feet no move—my head sore! But last night, all tiki gods have big time—zow luau. When drums begin to pound, my head full. Big sound!

RONGO
(Chants in Hawaiian.) Me Rongo—God of Agriculture. My land so good to me, I got time for sport. I fly kite. Me number one kite-flyer. Too bad I don’t have key—then me, I find electricity.

PELE
I am Pele: Goddess of Fire and Volcanoes. Some say I torment poor Ngendei, the Earth Balancer. For when my violent temper rises, the Earth trembles on its foundation!

NGENDEI
Legends say I’m balancing the Earth—but sad to say, I’m just hanging on.

PELE
I’m the one who’s really sad! When I smile it comes out mad!

TANGAROA-RU
They call me Tangaroa-Ru, the East Wind.

HINA KULUUA
And I am Hina, Goddess of Rain.

TANGAROA-RU
We often travel together, wind and rain—through tropic lands across the seven seas!

HINA KULUUA
Come closer so that you may see what magic there is in fantasy.

TANGAROA
I am Tangaroa—Father of all Gods and Godesses. Here in this land of enchantment, I appear before you as a mighty tree. Stand back! Oh, mystic powers, hear my call: from my limbs let new life fall.

ANNOUNCER
(Speaks Hawaiian.) Ladies and Gentlemen, come with us to a world of joyous songs and wondrous miracles—Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.

(Guests enter the Tiki Room. Cast member gives spiel and then wakes up Jose.)

JOSE
Ah, buenos dias, señorita. My siestas are getting are getting chorter and chorter. Oh, look at all the people! Welcome to Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room. Hey, Michael, mi amigo! Pay attention—it’s showtime.

MICHAEL
So it is. And what darling people I have sittin’ under me. Pierre, you rascal, you! Let’s put on the show.

PIERRE
Mon ami, I am always ready, as you say, to put on ze show. (Whistles.) Oh pardon, madame, that whistle was for my good friend Fritz.

FRITZ
Ach tu lieber! I almost fell out of mein upper perch. Glad to see you all aboard—uh, ashore—or—(Laughs.) Verever you are! Mein goodness, you’re all shtaring at us. We better shtart the show rolling!

MICHAEL
Wait! Wait! We forgot to wake up the glee club!

(Whistle blows, followed by loud squawking from the birds.)

JOSE
Ole! Ole! It’s showtime!

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.

JOSE
All the birds sing words,

MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

JOSE
Welcome to our tropical hideaway,
You lucky people, you!
If we weren’t in the show, starting right away,
We’d be in the audience too!

CHORUS
All together!
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.

JOSE
All the birds sing words,

MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

MICHAEL
I sing so beautiful—I should sing solo!

JOSE
Si… So low we can’t hear you!

PIERRE
My voice may not be so marvelous, but my profile is out of zis world!

FRITZ
Jawohl, but the trouble is it’s not far enough out of this world. Isn’t that right, Herr Schmidt? Oh-ho, I see—Schmidt has no hair!

JOSE
Mi amigos, stop the clucking. You sound like a bunch of old hens. There’s a lot of birds waiting to go on. For instance…

MICHEL
The boys in the back are kamikaze.

JOSE
Because of their claws?

MICHAEL
No—because they’re macaws!
And our fine feathered friend is a jolly toucan.
And two can sound better than one toucan can.

JOSE
The bird of paradise is an elegant bird.
It likes to be seen, and it loves to be heard.
Most little birdies will fly away,
But the Tiki Room birds are here everyday.

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.

JOSE
All the birds sing words,

MICHAEL
And the flowers croon,

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

JOSE
Our magnificent production is yet to come,
So strum the guitar, and beat the drum.
We’ve been a hit, and we know you adore us,
So come on, and join us in another chorus!

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.

JOSE
A little softer!

CHORUS
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

JOSE
A little louder!

CHORUS
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room.
All the birds sing words, and the flowers croon,
In the Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki, Tiki Room!

(Song ends.)

JOSE
Let’s give the little birdies a great big hand!

PIERRE
Oui. Applause, applause!

FRITZ
Ja! You down there—mit both hands!

JOSE
And now, señors and señoritas, please place your eyes into the center—of the room, that is. We present the enchanted fountain.

FRITZ
Ach, ja! And the wunderbar bird mobile… Which has birds on it. And it goes round and round. Und dat’s why they call it a “bird mobile.”

MICHAEL
Look, here come the girls!

PIERRE
Madames and monsieur—introducing the lovely ladies of the ensembles. Just like the Follies Bergère with all the feathers. There’s Collette! Allo, Collette. Suzette! Allo, Mimi! Gigi! Fifa! Hehe, oh Fifi!

JOSE
I wonder what happened to Rosita…

BIRD MOBILE
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing:
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.

Let’s all warble like nightingales.
Give your throat a treat.
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.

JOSE (à la Bing Crosby)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing
Buh-buh-buh, buh buh-buh-buh, buh buh!

FRITZ (à la Louis Armstrong)
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,
Tweet, tweet, tweet—
My, that bird sings sweetly!

PIERRE (à la Maurice Chevalier)
Let’s all warble like nightingales—
Ah, Mimi, c’est magnifique!
Take your time from ze birds,
Now you all know ze words.
Sing along with us!

JOSE
Now we want you people down there to sing along with us birds up here. All together now. “Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”

CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,

JOSE
“Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.”

CHORUS
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.

JOSE
“Let’s all sing like the birdies sing.”

CHORUS
Let’s all sing like the birdies sing,

JOSE
“Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.”

CHORUS
Sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet, sweet.

JOSE
“Let’s all warble like nightingales,”

CHORUS
Let’s all warble like nightingales,

JOSE
“Give your throat a treat!”

CHORUS
Give your throat a treat.

JOSE
“Take your time from the birds,”

CHORUS
Take your time from the birds,
Now you all know the words:
Tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet, tweet.

JOSE
Everybody whistle!

(Everyone whistles until the end of the song.)

JOSE
Applause! Applause! That’s so good!

FRITZ
Wunderbar! Wunderbar! Give yourself a hand!

PIERRE
Ah, zat was magnifique!

JOSE
Si, no one laid an egg but me.

MICHAEL
And now, ladies and gentlemen, we have something really big for you.

FRITZ
Ja, the birds schtand schtill, und the Tiki Room flies away!

PIERRE
Mon ami, quit talking while I’m interrupting. Ladies and gentlemen, now we present—direct from the islands—a musical luau!

FLOWERS
Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.

Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.

Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.

Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.

Tahuwai la a tahuwai wai la,
Ehu hene la a pili koo lua la,
Pututui lu a ite toe la,
Hanu lipo ita paalai.

Au we ta huala,
Au we ta huala.
Huala, huala, huala.

(Tiki idols begin drumming and chanting. The flowers join in for a reprise of “Hawaiian War Chant.” Song climaxes in rain and thunder.)

FRITZ
Ach, somebody has schtolen my thunder!

JOSE
I think someone has left the chower running.

MICHAEL
Be careful, me fine friends. The gods have been angered by all the celebratin’! But, me buckos, every cloud has a silver lining.

PIERRE
Monsieurs et madames, it’s time to say “adieu.” But we hope you will always remember the amazing things which happened here in Walt Disney’s Enchanted Tiki Room.

CHORUS
The birdies had their fling.
You’ve heard the flowers sing.
Tikis play the drums.
Hear them do the chant.
Farewell, and aloha to you!

JOSE
Ole! Ole! Applause! Let’s give the birds a standing ovation! Applause! Up, up, down there! Applause! Everybody stand up on your feet! Ole!

MICHAEL
And now, as long as you’re all standin’…

JOSE
We have a wonderful magic trick for you.

FRITZ
Ja, a wunderbar trick! Everybody, face the door, und the trick is, ve gonna make you all… disappear!

CHORUS
Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go.
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.

Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Keep marching in a row,
Don’t stop to look or read a book,
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.

Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Just lift your feet and go.
We’ll sing this song; you march along!
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.

Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Step lively—not so slow!
Come back again; we’ll see you then.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.

Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
Make room for our next show!
There’s folks outside; go take a ride.
Heigh ho. Heigh ho, heigh ho.

Heigh ho. Heigh ho.
It’s out the door you go!
We hope you’ve all enjoyed the show.
Heigh ho! Heigh ho!

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Haunted Mansion Holiday (Disneyland)

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*Sung lyrics in bold.

(Guests enter foyer.)

GHOST HOST
‘Twas a long time ago (longer now than it seems),
In a place that, perhaps, you have seen in your dreams.
For the story that you are about to be told
Began in the holiday worlds of old.
I know you’re curious to see what’s inside.
It’s what happens when two holidays collide!

(Guests enter Stretching Room.)

Welcome, my friends, to our Christmas delight!
Come witness a ghoulishly glorious sight.
It’s time for our holiday tale to begin.
There’s no turning back now—please, come all the way in.

Our holiday tale is a tale that’s quite charming,
But during this season, it’s sometimes alarming.
So relax and reflect, feel free to take pause,
While we tell you a tale about dear Sandy Claws.

(Room begins stretching. Sounds of glass breaking.)

CHORUS
La la la la la, etc.

GHOST HOST
‘Twas the nightmare before Christmas, and all through the house,
Not a creature was peaceful—not even a mouse.
The stockings, all hung by the chimney with care,
When opened that morning would cause such a scare.
The children, nestled all snug in their beds,
Would have nightmares of monsters and skeleton heads. (Laughs.)

(Glass breaking sound overhead reveals Jack and Zero.)

JACK SKELLINGTON
Happy holidays, everyone! (Laughs.)

(Scream and crashing sound, followed by laughter and eerie singing.)

GHOST HOST
Now hurry along. As they say, “Look alive.”
This is one holiday you will want to survive. (Laughs.)

(Guests proceed into hallway.)

Jack Skellington came here from Halloween Town,
You’ll notice his handiwork scattered around.
This year, he’s decided to play Sandy Claws,
But when Halloween creates Christmas… you might see a few flaws.

And now, a dark carriage will take you away.
Sit back, rest in peace, in your black Christmas sleigh.
Your sleigh will accommodate one or two more.
We hope you’re prepared for what Jack has in store.

(Guests board doom buggies.)

Don’t pull down the bar—it will float down with ease.
And keep a close watch on all children, please.
All good ghouls and boys must sit safe in their seats,
And keep in their sleigh all hands, arms, legs, or feets.

(Spanish safety spiel.)

More rapid than vultures, the Mansion was changed.
All was soon covered, adorned, and deranged.
And what, to your wondering eyes, disappears,
Is Jack’s little friend Zero—the ghost dog reindeer!

Nothing here was forgotten—it all looks so pleasant.
“A coffin,” Jack says, “makes a fine Christmas present.” (Laughs.)
A man-eating plant makes a wonderful wreath,
As long as you don’t get caught in its teeth!

Jack’s holiday vision was unlike no other,
So ring out the bells! There’s more cheer to uncover.

MADAME LEOTA
On the 13th day of Christmas, my ghoul love gave to me
Thirteen rings of power—embracing strength that never ends.
Twelve signs of the zodiac that rule the future and transcend.
Eleven candles floating—their scent of mystery in the air.
Ten telling tea leaves that swirl with secrets yet to share.

On the ninth day of Christmas, my ghoul love gave to me
Nine magic crystals that sparkle with a force that is pure.
Eight balls of knowledge that answer with a truth that is sure.
Seven pearls of wisdom to keep my love bewitched to me.
Six mystic mirrors, reflecting futures yet to be.

On the fifth day of Christmas, my ghoul love gave to me
Five lucky charms, to understand the right from wrong.
Four wheels of fortune, to spin their rich and golden song.
Three life lines—extending help to those in need.
Two passion potions, that love and romance may succeed.

On the first day of Christmas, my ghoul love gave to me
A Star! A brilliant star for my fortune card tree.

(Ride vehicles enter ballroom.)

GHOST HOST
With some treats and some games, you can make a scene merry.
Why, even a gingerbread house can seem scary!
All at once, happy haunts did materialize,
Like a nightmarish painting by Currier and Ives.

(Ride vehicles enter attic.)

A bag full of toys, Jack had slung on his back.
They were strange and bizarre—and on the attack!

(Ride vehicles enter graveyard.)

Sandy Claws worked his magic, both outside and in.
But one final touch made his bony face grin.
“Now what better gift on my friends to bestow
Than a graveyard that’s covered in ghostly white snow.”

JACK SKELLINGTON
It’s Christmas! Have you been good this year? Ho-ho-ho! What’s this? Can you believe your eyes? I like this Christmas thing! See Zero—I told you they would like our Christmas! Fruitcake anyone? Ho-ho-ho! I really outdid myself this time! Look at all the happy faces. Seasons greetings, everyone! Ho-ho-ho-ho-ho, hee-hee-hee! It’s Christmas time! Welcome to my Christmas delight! Have you been naughty or nice? I have a special present just for you! Happy Holidays, everyone!

GHOST CHORUS
What’s this? What’s this? What’s this? What’s this? 
We wish you a scary Christmas 
And a Haunted New Year!
Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize!

Fa la la la! Fa la la la la la la la la la!
What’s this? What’s this? What’s this? What’s this?
Jolly dear old Sandy Claws,
While the graveyard sleeps,
Down the chimney dark and damp,
With your sack, you creep.
Happy haunts materialize
For a swinging wake.
Glowing pumpkins harmonize.
Joyful screams we’ll make!

Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho!
Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho!
Fa la la la! Fa la la la la la la la la la!
Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize!

What’s this? What’s this? What’s this? What’s this?
Garlands made of iron chains,
Candles glowing bright.
Spiders make good ornaments
For our tree of fright!
Creepy crypts look awful nice,
Tied up in a bow.
Now our graveyard’s pure and white,
With the ghostly snow!

Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho!
Ho-ho-ho, ho-ho-ho!
Grim grinning ghosts come out to socialize!

OOGIE BOOGIE
Welcome to Oogie’s holiday tricks and treats! Round and round she goes. What’s your gift? Oogie knows! (Laughs.) Are you getting a trick or a treat? Isn’t this fun?! Ooh, I can’t wait to see what you get. It’s gift-giving time! You get what you get! Have I got a present for you?! (Laughs.) It’s all good here—sugar and spice, naughty and nice. Have you been naughty or nice, huh? Well, looky who we got here! I have a special holiday something, just for you. Hang on to your holiday hat! Oogie’s got some gifts for ya! So, you found me? Too late now—it’s time for your gift! (Laughs.) Oogie just loves sharing, and you’re about to see how generous old Oogie can be. Ooh, this is gonna be fun!

MALE SAFETY ANNOUNCER
Please exit by stepping away from the car with your left foot first. Step out, and stand on the moving platform.

FEMALE SAFETY ANNOUNCER
Please exit to your left by stepping away from the cars with your left foot first. Step out, and stand on the moving platform.

(Guests exit doom buggies and take moving platform up ramp.)

JACK SKELLINGTON
Merry Christmas, one and all!

SALLY
Thank you, Sandy Claws, for bringing good cheer.
Please hurry back—we can’t wait ’til next year!
And I heard him exclaim, as he drove out of sight…

JACK SKELLINGTON
The world will not forget my Christmas night!

SALLY
Hurry back! Hurry back!
Be sure to bring your Sandy Claws sack.
I’ll be waiting to open my Christmas presents.
Hurry back! Hurry back…

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